Shows P

speculates. He tells her that he’s invited all of Hollywood’s head honchos to a big party for the Country Palace. But only Hocus Focus Films accepted, in the person of Mort de Soleil. They’re hoping to be discovered. They sing a reprise of “For Better for Worse.” Clive, the stage manager, announces that a “ life or death” message has arrived for Miss Sally “from a Phantom Friend.” Suddenly, the flying pig drops from the ceiling, hung from a noose. We hear a voice from off stage threatening her with more than just “technical difficulties,” if she sings “If I Could Hold You” again. Major Billy lets out a stunned “Soo-ee!” The next day at the backup auditions, Clive addresses Chrissy and some other auditioners and Officer Crenshaw. Major Billy, Sally and Skipper enter and sit at the audition table. One by one the other singers fail to sing a high C until Chrissy nails it. She’s hired and it’s time for Major Billy to “get better acquainted.” Clive saves her from Billy’s advances having her fill out her W-4 and Over-size Wig Consent Form. Chrissy meets the other backup singers, June and Patsy who advise her that the best way to keep Billy at bay is keep mentioning his wife, Sally. Billy shoes the others away to begin his private tutoring session with Chrissy. He gets a little fresh and she tells him where to get off just as some bales of hay start to fall around them. As Billy decides to grab some Barbecue, Aaron--a stagehand--arrives. Stacking the bales, he tells her ominously that there are no such things as ghosts. The next morning, Chrissy arrives early to find Aaron already setting up the stage. He tells her that he recognizes her from articles about La Scala, but her secret is safe with him. A telegram arrives from Antonio in La Scala, and she sings of what he writes in “A Telegram,” while Aaron listens nearby. He desperately misses her and “desperate men do desperate things.” Sally, Clive, and the others arrive—including, Andrew, Lloyd and Weber—and the rehearsal begins “Country Music Rehearsal.” It doesn’t go well for Chrissy. She goes off to find a place to rehearse. In a subterranean recording studio, Aaron is mooning over a picture of Chrissy; she enters. She tells him about the rehearsal, and he offers to help, singing “Voice Lesson.” She opens up to him, telling of the father she never knew. He reminds her that she must sing with her heart. All she need do is remember her mother and the love that she gave her in “Two Roads Meet.” Chrissy finds her true voice again singing a reprise of “Somebody’s Calling Me Home.” He offers to let her sing his song “If I Could Hold You!” “You wrote this? It’s a classic! Aaron, who are you?” He tells her it’s a long story. She gets a little spooked and leaves. With a half-hour to go before the Extravaganza, Mort de Soliel (of Hocus Focus Pictures) and his assistant, Crystal Light introduce themselves to Billy and Sally. Aaron is hovering in the background. He can’t wait to hear “If I Could Hold You.” They leave. Sally plays a tape that the Phantom left her. It demands that they feature Chrissy in the Extravaganza. Sally wants to show this guy whose boss and fire Chrissy right away, but since they need her tonight they agree to fire her in the morning. Billy and Sally sing a reprise of “For Better, For Worse.” Later, Aaron hypnotizes Sally instructing her to give Chrissy a chance. Onstage the show is beginning. Major Billy introduces the chorus and they sing “Extravaganza Montage.” The Hoggettes—Patsy, June and Chrissy—continue the song as we hear Billy instructing Aaron to release the 2,000 helium balloons only on cue. A male quartet enters and sings “Does Your Daddy Know You Like to Kiss Cowboys?” Next on the program, Skipper dedicates his song to Chrissy “The Train of Adolescence.” “The train of Adolescence is runnin’ down my track. / I’m seven miles from puberty, and I ain’t turnin’ back.” Aaron passes his hand over Sally’s face just as she prepares to enter. “Your country days are over” say he. Sally starts to sing “If I Could Hold You,” but keeps mingling in bits of opera and other songs. Mort and Crystal get up and leave. Who can save the show? Chrissy knows the song! She sings it and it’s a triumph. The ensemble joins her and they sing “Country Music is My Home—Finale.” Sally sees what’s happening from offstage and turns on the helium tanks. Just as Chrissy is finishing her triumphal debut, she suddenly starts to sound like a chipmunk. Skipper is reading the National Enquirer on the steps of the Palace, joined by the ensemble as he sings “Night of Terror, . . . Helium Cologne threatens pretty unknown.” As the song continues, Sally—in a neck brace— is in her dressing room being questioned by Officer Crenshaw; Major Billy is reading a tabloid. Mort and Crystal appear speaking with their Japanese owners. The boss orders them back to Nashville: Sally’s faux pas has made her more popular than ever. In a restaurant, Chrissy and Antonio read the stories in the tabloids: “Satan Worship Blamed for Backup Singer’s Dirty Tricks.” Antonio tries to convince Chrissy to return to the opera: he’ll change cities,